[ xi. strength. ]
( it is easy to be brave when there is no danger. )
i. false sanctuary
he grows up where solace hardly exists. it leaves itself in fragments, hiding in the crevices of one’s mind.
he grows up in times of war; he is too young and too innocent. he is naive and happy despite everything that happens around him.
he understands that there is fighting and violence, but he does not understand the extent, nor what it truly means. he doesn't understand that fighting means bloodshed; he doesn't understand when they tell him that his father won't return from the war. his brows narrow and curiosity fills bright eyes when they tell him the news.
his mother's tears never fall. the words remain stuck in her throat and one day,
she knows he will understand.
( she doesn't know whether it's a curse or blessing to know that he is still a child of naivety and not one that knows the reality of war. )
ii. ignorant courage
when he is older, he learns more about war. he learns of the pain, the grief, the sorrow-- he learns what war really is. he learns where his family has gone and why they are gone.
he learns that he has lost them.
sooner or later, he will have to fight. he is not afraid, he says.
there's a weak smile that crosses his lips as his fingers drum against the worn table. he's thought about this a lot-- to grow up with war means there is no escape from this harsh reality. his older brother listens intently to his every word and there's this fear that fills a dreadful heart; he has known the experience of war.
this is not something he wants his little brother to go through, even though he knows there is nothing he can do to prevent it.
"i want to fight." he announces, his words laced with determination.
he sees the flicker of horror that appears on his sibling's face and his smile grows, but sadness accompanies it.
"i'll be okay. i promise."
his brother does not speak for what feels like years. he stares and stares, searching for that little boy that used to be as bright as the sun. he doesn't want to care for promises; it means nothing in this world.
still, he hopes that it is not broken. they have lost too much family already. he will not lose his little brother.
( oh little one,
even ares wishes to spare you from this violence. )
iii. amidst the chaos
when he first runs into the battlefield, his heartbeat rings violently in his ears. the adrenaline rushes throughout his body and he feels as if his heart might burst from his chest.
he remembers his ignorance of war; he believed he had grown out of it, but when eyes scan the battlefield, there is only chaos that greets his sights. it makes him realize how frightened he is. it makes him realize how light his words seemed back then.
he realizes how foolish he was, but now, even with the fear that clutches onto him, he finds resolve. no matter how dangerous it may be, no matter how horrific it may be, he will fight. he will find strength in himself, in his brother, and his comrades.
he reminds himself to keep his promise. he will be okay. he will survive.
he will go home.
( survive, soldier. )
Author's Note: The original story is titled "The Sheep and the Pig". The shepherd picks up the pig, which results in the pig making loud noises. The sheep find this amusing and ask why the pig reacts in such a way; when they get picked up by the shepherd, they don't act in such an embarrassing way. The pig tells them that the shepherd only wants their wool, but when it comes to itself, he wants bacon. The last line of the story is "It is easy to be brave when there is no danger". Originally, it was supposed to be a story with an adult telling a child how difficult it is to be courageous, but then I thought of a child who knew very little of war. As they grew up, they were determined to fight in the war without any hesitation because they weren't truly in danger yet. I used the strength arcana because even at the end, despite his fear, he learned to be strong and fight for what he cared about.
